Sunday, April 10, 2011

A Day to Remember

Author's Note: Over this weekend, I had a great time with my family.  I felt like doing a response-like piece to my weekend.  In this piece, I wanted to add some syntactic devices and my own weekend experience.  I have also been working on reducing my be-verbs by 30%.  
Happiness, joy, and fun really bring families together.  On Saturday, my dad's entire family came to my grandma's house and we had a spectacular day.  We had gathered there to remember the passing of my grandpa ten years ago and my uncle's birthday. No matter what the occasion is families should come together and enjoy the time that they can have with each other.

Most of my cousins and I spent the majority of our day outside since it was a sunny and warm.  Later some of my uncles and aunts came out too.  After thinking about it, what we did wasn't really to my interest, it was the time with my family that made it fun.  Whatever game we played, food we ate, or picture we took did not matter; we made it fun and creative by being with the ones we love. 

Any family can enjoy each other and it doesn't depend on what they're doing.  My memory will keep my perfect day with family full of love and joy. 


  1. I really enjoyed reading this piece I think what you said is really true, that even when your not doing something of your interest with your family it is the time spent with them that counts. I think you conveyed a good message and I could definitely pick out the syntactic devices as you mentioned in your author's note. Nice Job!

  2. You realized your goal in this piece. The syntactic device works so well, and also the reduction of be-verbs strengthened the text. Look at how the second paragraph still has a bit of that influence. The difference is clear to me. Well done. One of the things I love about you is your ability to accurately self-assess, set goals, and meet them with discipline. Excellent.